“We are having a problem with this shame-resilience group.”
“What is that?”
“We don’t like the word ‘shame.’”
“What do you want to do about it?”
“We’d like to call it ‘sha-may’.”
This is part of a dialogue in a delightful clip of Dr. Brene Brown’s presentation at the “Up Experience.” If you haven’t yet heard of Brene Brown, she is a sociologist and a self-proclaimed “shame-researcher.”
As a women passionate about helping other women live authentic, courageous, connected, compassionate lives, I have been intrigued by Dr. Brown’s work on shame and vulnerability and her invitation to women and men to yield striving in perfectionism and performance.
(I also enjoy the fact that Dr. Brown will be found in either cowgirl boots or clogs. If you know me, you know why:-)!)
Her sense of humor and delight in story is compelling, and she is majoring on all the important attributes of a life well-lived. I’m a fan.
As I listened to her thoughts on shame and “living story,” I thought about my life and the lives of women I coach. We desperately need to know the real reason we have freedom from sha-may. Brene says the cure for perfection and performance is knowing “I am enough.” I would adjust that slightly and say, “I am not enough. Christ is more-than-enough. The odd truth of the gospel is that God gave me Christ’s more-than-enough-ness. (righteousness).”
According to the gospel, my real hope for freedom from shame comes from the Cross. Here is the strange storyline: Christ died for me, a sinner, on the Cross, and even more surprising, God has called me “so very right” in Christ.
Here’s what that looks like in real life: I’ve done things I should be ashamed of – sin — turned my back on a friend, yelled at my children, dissed my husband. There’s no enough-ness in me that can save me from that shame. But Christ can, Christ has, and Christ will again. Christ, the perfect, sinless God-man, so much more-than-enough, shamed “sha-may.” In Christ, God has made me new creation and declared me — more-than-enough-in-Christ.
Therein lies the freedom from perfectionism that our hearts desperately need. In this story, we truly can live freely enjoying and glorifying God, enjoying and loving others.
Elizabeth; Thank you for sharing this encouraging post. I am a Brene Brown fan and I love her presentation on shame. Very powerful. But your line says it all: “I am not enough. Christ is more-than-enough. The odd truth of the gospel is that God gave me Christ’s more-than-enough-ness.” Perfect! I’m glad I found you here…
Oh, Karen, isn’t Brene wonderful? She is such a voice to encourage connection and leaving behind perfectionism and shame. So I loved putting her powerful material together with the gospel. Glad you were encouraged!
This is such a great depiction of God’s grace, Elizabeth! And this speaks loud to me today, ” “I am not enough. Christ is more-than-enough. The odd truth of the gospel is that God gave me Christ’s more-than-enough-ness. (righteousness).” So thankful for God’s more-than-enough grace for this helpless daughter. Bless you and your words! Thanks for linking-up today. 😀
Hi Meredith – I loved the opportunity to link up today, and your thoughts on grace-words. This is the conversation worth having — reminding one another of the glory of his grace and how it changes life!
“There’s no enough-ness in me that can save me from that shame. But Christ can, Christ has, and Christ will again.” LOVE! Thanks so much for preaching this beautiful message of freedom!
Thanks, Kimm, and for being another who spreads this message of freedom and hope in the gospel!