Numbering Our Days: Gospel Comfort for Caregivers

by | Sep 29, 2021 | Numbering Our Days, Suffering, Weekly Gospel Meditation

Numbering Our Days: Gospel Comfort for Caregivers

Dear Friends,

This month’s Numbering Our Days post is for all of you caregivers and all of the caregivers you love. Don’t forget to sign up if you want to receive the monthly column, Numbering Our Days: A Gospel Perspective on Aging, Caregiving, and End of Life in your inbox. You’ll also get the free Caregiver’s Checkup.

Did you know that caregiving can be hazardous to your health? It’s true. Studies have shown that the chronic stress of caregiving can be likened to the stress of war. And sadly, caregivers tend to prioritize their loved one’s health to the detriment of their own. In today’s linked post with the enCourage blog, learn how and why self-care for the caregiver is essential.

And as always with this series, please send me your thoughts and questions and struggles. I am praying for us all as we become intentional about numbering our days.

My father was dying of cancer, and I was caring for our twenty-two-year-old son who had already had three surgeries for a brain tumor and now required IV antibiotics four times daily. I skipped my yearly physical and my yearly mammogram. I ate more sugar and exercised less. I slept poorly. Strands of hair came out in my hands as I washed it. Dark half-moons carved themselves into the skin under my eyes, and fatigue fell over me like a persistent fog. During my most intense season of caregiving, my self-care deteriorated rapidly, and my body paid the price.

According to the 2020 AARP Study on Caregiving, I was not alone. Of the approximately 53 million people who are now providing unpaid care for an adult with “health or functional needs,” at least 23 percent say caregiving has worsened their physical health.[i] Kelly Markham, LCSW and palliative care expert, explains the lethal cycle: The caregiver believes that she alone can tend to the loved one properly; the loved one often reinforces that belief. Under the chronic stress of caregiving, the caregiver’s health suffers. Committed to caring for her loved one, the caregiver neglects her own care. Such neglect of self-care has been shown to lead to an earlier and higher mortality rate for caregivers as compared to non-caregivers.

Continue reading on the enCourage blog…

Hope for Recovery: God Is With Me

by | Sep 28, 2021 | Devotional, Suffering, Weekly Gospel Meditation

Hope for Recovery: God Is With Me

Win books! This month, as we celebrate the one-year-birthday of From Recovery to Restoration: 60 Meditations for Finding Peace & Hope in Crisis, I’m giving away four books each week. See above for this week’s books. Enter for a chance to win. To have more chances to win, share about the book more often or share the excerpts on the blog and let me know how many times you shared. 

Today’s blog is an excerpt from the devotional. I’ll be sharing excerpts every week. You can continue to share and have chances to win different books each week. 

You Are with Me

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,I will fear no evil, for you are with me;Your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23:4, ESV

Traversing the road of recovery is not unlike walking through the valley of the shadow of death. Each journey is complex and mysterious, of uncertain length, and fraught with unknown fears. And yet, according to David, who journeyed through many dark valleys, we can “fear no evil,” because we are not alone. The Lord is closer than whispering distance, guarding and guiding us with his presence. 

Imagine you find yourself in a narrow alleyway running between two high buildings in a dangerous urban area. No streetlights. No building lights. Stark starless night darkness. You can’t see the tips of your fingers, much less the end of the alleyway. It’s too late to return to the other side, before you saw what you saw, before the surgeon made the cut, before your loved one died. The recovery road has much in common with David’s valley of deep darkness.

Notice that David walks through this valley of deep darkness; he doesn’t run, even though he might be tempted to do so. Running isn’t usually an option when you’re recovering from disaster. Notice that David walks through this deep valley. There is no way around it; there is no turning back. The only way is to go through it, to get to the other side. Notice that David is alone in this deep darkness: “Even though I walk.” Even when we are in healthy community, we can feel isolated in recovery, as if no one else has ever walked this particular shadowland before. 

How would it be possible to fear no evil in a place of such “suspense and surmise,” in which “the evil of evils is uncertainty”? The answer comes in the pivot point, verse four, “For you are with me.” Earlier, David told us that the Lord, third person, is his shepherd; now he addresses the Lord directly:

“You are with me.”

You, the King of kings, are with me.

You, the Lion of Judah, are with me.

You, the Crusher of Satan, are with me.

Take heart, dear friends. His light, the light that has overcome the darkness, has flooded this dark valley. The Lord, your Shepherd, who protects and guides you with his staff, is with you. 

Prayer

Lord,

You are our Shepherd. We trust you to guide us, protect us, and secure us in this dark valley of deep uncertainty. Surround us with your love and mercy that we may never stray from you. Amen.

Further Encouragement

Read Psalm 23.

Listen to “God Is My Shepherd,” by Jon Foreman.

For Reflection

What dark valley are you walking through right now? What is uncertain and frightening? How does it help to know the Lord is your shepherd?

A Prayer about Help for the Falling

by | Sep 25, 2021 | Daily Prayer, Suffering

A Prayer about Help for the Falling

Our Strength and Our Song,

You have become our salvation. 

When we’ve been surrounded by enemies on every side—

financial stress, caregiving exhaustion, 

troubled teens, sickness and death, 

our own sinful choices,

buzzing around us like angry bees, 

we were “pushed hard,” 

and we were falling. 

We might have landed in the chasm of despair, 

but you helped us. 

Because you are our salvation,

“We shall not die but shall live, 

and recount the deeds of the Lord” (Psalm 118:17).

You have indeed opened the gates of righteousness to us, 

that we may “enter through them, 

and give thanks to the Lord” (Psalm 118: 19).

Today, we stand in awe of you, 

marveling at your rescue, 

singing with the saints,

“This is the day that the Lord has made; 

let us rejoice and be glad in it” (Psalm 118:24). 

In Jesus’ saving name. Amen.

Read Psalm 118:1-29. 

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When You Can’t Share Your Prayer Requests

by | Sep 21, 2021 | Devotional, Suffering, Weekly Gospel Meditation

When You Can’t Share Your Prayer Requests

Win books! This month, as we celebrate the one-year-birthday of From Recovery to Restoration: 60 Meditations for Finding Peace & Hope in Crisis, I’m giving away four books each week. See above for this week’s books. Enter for a chance to win. To have more chances to win, share about the book more often or share the excerpts on the blog and let me know how many times you shared. 

Today’s blog is an excerpt from the devotional. I’ll be sharing excerpts every week. You can continue to share and have chances to win different books each week. 

Unspoken

For we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. Romans 8:26

When our son was diagnosed with a brain tumor, I readily shared prayer requests for our many needs. Even as I shared, it occurred to me that many people do not ask for prayer because their crisis seems too painful or private to share. Maybe their daughter was harming herself, or their son was addicted to drugs, or their husband’s business was failing. 

If you struggle to find a voice or a place to share your prayer requests, whether because of sorrow or shame or shock, take heart. The good news of the gospel is that your Father knows your needs before you ask, the Holy Spirit and the Son are interceding for you, and God has provided trustworthy people on this earth to pray for you. Let’s consider each of these provisions in turn. 

First, Jesus, in teaching his disciples to pray simply and secretly, assured them, “your Father knows what you need even before you ask him” (Matthew 6:9). Unlike the robots Alexa or Siri, God always listens to our hearts and always understands our needs and requests, whether they’re spoken or unspoken.

Not only is the Father “attentive to our prayers” (1 Peter 5:12), he has also given us the Holy Spirit to dwell in us and to join us in our “unutterable groanings” (Romans 8:26). As the Spirit groans in us, the Father translates our requests and transforms our hearts, providing for our deepest needs (Romans 8:27). 

Not only is the Holy Spirit interceding for us, Jesus himself, the great High Priest actually sits on a throne beside his Father in heaven, interceding for us. According to Hebrews 7:25: “Therefore he is able, once and forever, to save those who come to God through him. He lives forever to intercede with God on their behalf” (NLT). What we cannot speak for ourselves, Jesus speaks for us.

In addition to his ever-present attention and his Spirit and his Son’s intercession, God has given us in-the-flesh warriors, his church, to pray for us. While you may not want to share private or painful prayer requests with the whole church, you can find relief and healing in sharing your needs with one trusted friend, ministry leader, or pastor (James 5:12). The Lord has provided us community in Christ so that we don’t have to carry the burdens of crisis alone.

Dear friend, when your crisis feels too painful to share, take heart. The Father who knows all of your needs before you ask has provided a powerful army of prayer warriors to come alongside you and do battle for you. 

Prayer

Father,

You know the agony we feel when we can’t share the painful realities of our broken stories. Thank you for assuring us that your Son and your Spirit and your church groan alongside us. In Jesus’ advocating name we pray. Amen.

Further Encouragement

Read Matthew 6:5-8; Romans 8:25-34; Hebrews 7:25; James 5:12.

Listen to “Arise My Soul, Arise” by Indelible Grace.

For Reflection

If you have not been able to share your prayer needs during crisis, describe what that has been like. If you have felt free to share your prayer needs, describe what that has been like.

A Prayer about the One True King

by | Sep 18, 2021 | Daily Prayer, Theology

A Prayer about the One True King

King Jesus,

We admit, we in the Western world don’t understand much 

about kings and rulers and, really, your kind of politics.

After all, you are the King 

who created all things (can any other king in history say that?!), 

You created all things——

in heaven and on earth, 

visible and invisible, 

thrones and dominions 

and rulers and authorities 

(pause us to imagine the thrones you created 

and the dominions you granted, 

both those we have seen visibly in history 

and those that are not visible to us and are yet very real).

As we imagine other thrones and dominions and rulers and authorities, 

we may think of evil rulers 

like Nero or Hitler 

or Satan and his minions, “the prince of the power of the air.” 

Remind us that while you created them, 

you did not create them to be evil—

they chose commitment to self-rule 

over submission to your rule. 

And yet, though you created all things,

you chose submission to your Father’s rule 

over self-rule (Philippians 2:5).

Each and every day, we have a choice—

to serve you or to serve our own little fiefdoms.

By your grace, draw us to serve you as your ambassadors, 

because it is only in you 

that all things (everything that matters) hold together (Colossians 1:17). 

In your majestic name. Amen.

Read Colossians 1:15-23.

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